On Bailing out Fat Cats and other atrocities

• Golly Gee Willikers, haverim, the investment bankers who have received such tax largesse from the Bush administration, who have misdirected our economy from one that’s productive into one service-based now need us little-folk to bail them out. If we don’t we are threatened with depression on world-wide scale. $700,000,000,000. For openers—and Congress can’t ask who is to get how much? This is supposed to save their hides after they’ve flayed ours. And the money is somehow going to trickle down to those of us who had nothing to do with the melt-down but are its victims. What a country!

•The Red Sox have the second highest payroll in Major League Baseball; no wonder they ended up second in the A.L. East. Ah, but the odd thing is that the team that wound up in first has the lowest payroll in the Majors. I root for the Red Sox with more fervor than for anything else secular, but as long as the team made the playoffs I’m not unhappy that the Rays finished first. It’s a tale out of a child’s morality story. If the Old Town Team doesn’t make it to the top, I’m rooting for them—and there are two Rhode Islanders on the team. (Jews? I’m thinking not, but maybe…)

• Seven-hundred-billion-dollars? For openers?

• How come when we have a leader whose poll numbers are lower than his shoe size, who gets us embroiled in a war-of-choice which is a no-winner, and racked with scandal, we can’t just get rid of him the way Israel disposed of Olmert. Oh, I remember, our founding fathers, the same bewigged, knickers-wearing elitists who allowed slavery to continue, who created equal senators for each state (California with its population in excess of thirty-six and a half million, and Wyoming—with its population of hardly anyone, each gets two) prevented that. They were a tad afraid of democracy, you see.

• Remember the halcyon days (pre-GWB) when we wondered how best to use the trillion or so that was a surplus in the treasury?

• In its time of crises, Britain had Churchill to rally the people. In my parents’ time of economic disaster the nation had Roosevelt to inspire it. In those days there was greatness. Who do we get? Bush? What did we do that was so wrong? Why are we being punished with such blatant mediocrity?

• Oh, and then there was GWB’s plan to privatize Social Security by allowing us to invest our portion of it in the stock market? Wow, whataguy!

• It’s Yom Kippur time again. If the postal service is on the ball you will receive this on the Sabbath of Repentance. We are told that on Rosh Hashanah God inscribes the names of those to be saved and that on Yom Kippur the book is sealed. We are enjoined to ask for forgiveness of sins. Every year I make a deal with Him. I pretend that I’ll really, really, really try to be a better person, and He pretends to believe me. At least that’s the way it’s been for the past several decades and if it’s OK with Him to continue the charade, it’s OK by me too.

• Not that I don’t think government intervention is necessary. Hey, if Republicans want to transform market driven Wall Street into a People’s Republic, I’ll just sit back and enjoy the spectacle. It’s that we’ve been rushed into things before by these guys. We must invade Iraq to get to the weapons of mass destruction! We must pass the Patriot Act! We must invest 700 billion dollars! The sky is falling, the sky is falling! (Oh? Democrats want to put a cap on CEO’s salaries? Why, that’s just class warfare!) The villain here? It’s not GWB; he’s merely the current marionette. The problem goes back to the handlers of Ronnie Reagan. Government isn’t the solution, government is the problem. We have to untie the fetters that bind capitalism! We must deregulate. Well, folks, how’s that working out, exactly?

• Each year on Yom Kippur I pray in my own fashion for two things—life and health for family, friends and myself, and for belief in prayer. So far, He has granted the former and spared me the latter, and if I’m lucky, He’ll spare me again.

• The purpose of these columns over the year has been to stimulate thought and to provoke discussion. If I’ve offended I apologize; it was never my intention, though it may have been my result. Please forgive. I’ll make my amends to Him on Thursday.